Unclear Mind.

I have an unclear mind cluttered with more than my own thoughts, a box of secrets from various people that came open. In it I hold their thoughts, opinions, their bad days, their sorrow;everything that fuels pessimism. From both males & females, just jumbling around in my mind mixing and like a parasite feeding my own thoughts and making me vulnerable to my flaws. I cant help but to get depressed again, jealous, angry, annoyed, its eating at me. Its about 25 different problems...

I am spilling out this info here in hope it goes away like a bad memory and shuts the box or purges out the thoughts, whats the point in keeping some of this info? I dont know and wont know why some lingers more than others. But it seems there is different sickness and technology is failing, relationships are shattering faster this month alone. This seems to be a bad month a hurricane of issues piled up, and I am here trying to swallow the bad and convert it to a better time.

I have been able to control most of my nightmares now, slowly and surly trying to keep that balance and convert it to peaceful sleep for another night and to let me rest. So far so good, but when things like this spill over im bound for more nightmares tonight, I am really tired of avoiding sleep.

the only thing thats keeping me sane right now is the love i am getting from one person. its beautiful and warm, i cant lose it now, I need it more than oxygen. And all in the same moment that I realize that I need it ....I keep pushing it away and distracting myself with useless things of other people and their issues and I make them my own.